Like Totally, Awesome...Riiight?

This is what defines the title of my blawg. The audio torture that I experienced on the way to work this morning. The semi-torture that I face at work during lunch and sometimes during work! Like Totally! Like Oh-My-God!

This is when I should be actually getting some serious work done. But here I am writing on this blaaawg the only way to release all the pent up frustration!

Here is why -

What is with the abuse of the word "Like". I was quietly sitting in the shuttle bus gathering my thoughts for the start of the work day and weekend..it is a fridaaay! The lady sitting in the seat in front of me could not help but use the word "Like" as one uses the space bar while typing. "So my husband was like we should go to Puccini's for dinner and I was like yeah we should." "Did you go to like the meeting for like the new vendors" I was seriously beginning to not like her at this point. And she was LOUD. "My daughter and I have like this thing where we like do yoga every Saturday morning. The only time to like connect with each other you know?"
She has a daughter?????? And wants to connect with her... I really think her daughter dislikes her. Like really dislikes her. The only reason they probably connect with each other during yoga on a Saturday morning is because she can keep her fucking mouth like shut.

And then there is the sweet little fellow intern, from MIT no less. Seems smart and all...gives first impressions of a preppy girl, and you keep in mind that she goes to MIT, and has this crisp Boston accent...She always sits with her back so erect I fear it will snap someday and we will have to carry her in a stretcher to the emergency room (I don't give a damn about her back, I hate carrying people to the hospital). She always talks with her head tilted slightly to her right and she always has her hair in bangs that I feel are glued to her forehead with industrial strength adhesives and she coos, yes coos.

Now don't get get me wrong, I am all for the proper, pretty look and crisp, articulate manners but when they form a hybrid with suburban artifice is when it like starts grating on my cerebrum....And then you go to lunch with her. It is like (use of the word here is completely valid and justified) a whole new being is created in front of you... she squeals , screeches and screams... "Like Ohmygod, you want to start your own business...that's totally awesome!" And her eyes widen (as wide as an Asians eyes can, yes she is Chinese by origin but born and raised in the US) and she shakes her head in approval but the damn bangs stay put! She stares into the pacific ocean from the ocean view company cafeteria and sighs..."I feel so content with life right now. I have never felt so content in my entire life!" She is 19 yo. And I am completely dissatisfied with mine!

And then we spoke about wind surfing while puppy dawg eyes was driving us home from a late dinner one evening. Unfortunately she was seated right behind me (Every annoying person is always seated either directly in front of or behind me...ARRGH) and got so excited at the mention of wind surfing that she smacked her hands HARD in joy...on my seat...so that it hurt my back...ARRGH IMBECILE! It was her back that was supposed to crack and break NOT MINE!

See what I go through...Now I have to stay an additional 15 minutes in the office to finish my work because I spent it writing in here!